


(Absolutely No) Sympathy for the Devil

by victorine



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Accidental Marriage, M/M, Murder Husbands, Post-Episode: s03e13 The Wrath of the Lamb, Will is not exactly impressed by this, hannibal is literally the devil, more like demon husbands, technically they're dead but not DEAD dead, will's also not entirely happy about that
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 12:51:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 450
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18011249
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/victorine/pseuds/victorine
Summary: Inspired by Mads' and Bryan's headcanon that Hannibal is the actual Devil, how would Will react upon waking up in hell to find Hannibal neglected to tell him he's Lord of the Underworld? (Hint: *loudly*)





	(Absolutely No) Sympathy for the Devil

“Will.”

Silence

“Will, please.”

No response.

“I had thought you might be…”

Will spun around and jammed a finger into Hannibal’s – now bright red and scaly – chest. “You thought I might be what? Impressed? Awestruck? Thought I might swoon at your infernal power and big, manly horns?”

Hannibal stroked one of said appendages furtively. They _were_ fairly impressive, he thought. Many new arrivals to the underworld fainted at the mere sight of them – Will seemed more likely to break one off and stab Hannibal with it.

“I get down here and it turns out you’ve been the fucking _Devil_ the whole time and oh, by the way, we’re _married_ somehow?!” Will kept jabbing, and Hannibal found himself taking several uncharacteristic steps backwards.

“Shedding the blood of our shared enemy created a covenant, which in the context of our subsequent embrace-”

“And if you think I’m spending the rest of eternity in this fucking corset-”

“If the clothes are a… I believe the term is ‘deal-breaker,’ they can easily be exchanged. Though if I could request something slightly more tailored than your usual attire?”

“Sure, because it would be inappropriate to wear flannel when you’re CONSORT TO THE LORD OF THE FUCKING UNDERWORLD, WOULDN’T IT?”

“Again, if it’s-”

“The clothes are not the deal-breaker, Hannibal! The deal-breaker is you lying to me for the last five years – literally the last five years _of my life_ – and making me believe you were just a garden variety _human_ psychopath when you’re the actual Devil!”

“Garden variety?” Hannibal pouted. That wasn’t what Will had said during his lectures.

“Oh do _not_ look at me like that. We haven’t even gotten to the frame-job and the stabbing and the marinating my brain in anticipation of serving it as fucking canapes!”

“That is unfair, Will. I would never have used you for such a pedestrian thing as canapes.”

“Unfair? UN-FUCKING-FAIR?! You know what’s unfair, Hannibal? What’s unfair is that you tortured me for years, hurt everyone I cared about, dragged me down _to hell_ , and I still haven’t got to kiss you yet!”

Silence reigned inside hell. Even the sinners seemed to have stopped their screams of eternal torment to eavesdrop.

“Yet?” Hannibal said, trying not to grin.

“I… I mean it’s just because… oh, fuck it.” Will grabbed Hannibal by the horns and pulled him into a kiss that rivalled the firepits surrounding them for heat.

A few aeons later they broke apart.

“I still hate you, you know.”

“Would it help if I brought your pack down to live with us?”

“Did you just offer to mass murder my pets as a romantic gesture?”

“…Yes. Inappropriate?”

“Well, wait a minute, I didn’t say no.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you had fun reading this, please consider backing the Ravage Anthology, a beautiful hardback fanthology inspired by Hannibal and Dante's Inferno, featuring the work of 116 artists and writers (including me!), produced by the amazing Love Crime Books (the team behind the Radiance anthology). 
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